City of Lights

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Kya Hoga Nimmo, Nemo Aur Mattu Ka



ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

A debt of gratitude to Snehal, HP and everyone from PPP batch for their belief in this project.

To my friend Asif, for his enthusiasm and unflagging effort.

To the legendary Kurt, for convincing me to write blogs.

To Mattu, for her gracious tour through her life.

To Patni Computer Systems for providing me Internet access.

To my Manager who does'nt know anything about it.

Thanks also to Nimmo, Nemo, Veerappan, Mithun Da, Rajnikanth, Manoj Kumar, Rajesh Khanna, Dev Anand, Tushar Kapoor, Harry Potter, Dhoni and Angoor.

FACT


After getting a lot of bashing from Mattu (yes, she literally bashed me for everything, from Chucking in Carrom, to playing TT with a Hot babe, even though Mattu did not know how to hit a striker, or how to hold a cue stick, or how to serve a TT ball. Not to forget about the romour she spread about me marrying and having kids with Moi-Sne-Menor), I decided to take revenge, not only for me, but also for my dear friends, Dhoni and Harry Potter. So hear I am, writing my very first blog in cold blood.


Only one question looms: Kya Hoga Nimmo, Nemo Aur Mattu Ka?

AUTHOR’S NOTE

References to the life and times of Nimmo and Nemo are entirely factual. They can still be seen today on Star One and DVD's respectively.

Mattu is also Factual.

So hold on your breath and get ready for...

Kya Hoga Nimmo, Nemo Aur Mattu Ka

PROLOGUE

Somewhere in South India there lived three friends, named Nimmo -daughter of notorious crimal and smuggler of Sandal Wood and Ivory Tusks, yes you guessed it right Veerappan- , Nemo (pronounced Nimoh) -Son of veteran actor Mithun da- , and Mattu -Daughter of another industry veteran Rajnikanth.

The trio were having difficult times in life, their thoughts clashing with their parents, usual stuff.

CH 1- Last day at the Kholliage

Nimmo, Nemo and Mattu had decided to meet at a common place so that they can go together to the farewell party for the class of '04. While on the way to the kholliage (college in south indian accent) they decided to disscuss their future. Mattu said "I am going to become a doctor, but my dad want's me to become a software engineer and defy laws of W3C, just as he defies laws of gravity in his..." Nemo interrupted "Tell me, my dad want's me to be a hammer, a hathoda you see, he is even making a catch phrase for me, it goes something like
'Dikhne mein bevda,
bhaagne mein ghoda,
aur maarne mein hathoda'."
Every one was quiet for a while, then Nemo started again "What about you Nimmo what do you wanna do after studies". Nimmo got exited, no one had asked her thoughts before, everyone knew she was dumb (most dumber from the trio), she said "Me, lemme think....." she never gave an answer, Nemo and Mattu thought this was never going to come and continued their conversation. Nemo said "but Mattu what are you gonna specialize in? you are good at nothing", Mattu frowned, she thought it was true, but said "Can I specialize in saying 'Sick' in different ways?". Nemo and Nimmo were dumbstruck.

As soon as their conversation went on to become weirder they realized they are in front of the gates of Sarvapalli Radhakrishnan Kholliage of Smugling, Acting and Hamming. At the gates Angoor (Mattu's boyfriend) was waithing for them, he waved at them and they waved back. Nimmo and Nemo went on to see other friends and Mattu went to Angoor (Langoor ke moh mein Angoor, Khuda ki kudrat).

At the college (we will call it college hence forth, its hard to pronounce Kholliage so many times), Nimmo, Nemo and Mattu had taken Hamming, Acting and Smugling respectively as their major subjects in final year, completely opposite as their fathers would have desired them to take. Nimmo was very good at Hamming, she had done her project on Manoj Khanna (A mix of Manoj Kumar and Rajesh Khanna). She had impressed the External Examiner Dev Anand by her skills. Nemo was also good at acting (He was duped as the next superstar Nimoh by their HOD Tushar Kapoor (He had also suggested him to change his name to Kemo for good luck)). Mattu was not so good at smuggling (I should say, not even). All she did for her project was to smuggle pirated CD's of Himess Bhai, played them aload in college and got punished for it. Not to forget, she also lip sung the lyrics of the songs (Angoor got impressed of one of the songs and proposed her). Nimmo and Nemo always wondered where did she got those lyrics from.

The Farewell party was as usual, "Boring" with speeches, from the Principal, Peons, Typist Sandra aur pata nahi kiska baccha.

The Lunch time was the best part, they again started their disscussion about their future. They decided that they will go their way, against what their parents had thought for them, but they also knew that they are not gonna get any financial help from their parents for their not so great ideas. So They decided on a Plan to get money to fund their respective purposes in life.

A Plan which is going to get them Doomed.

Dekhte hain kya hota hai Nimmo, Nemo aur Mattu ka......Hum Log.

44 Comments:

Blogger Ziom said...

#Ppl
My first post :)
Don't worry about the grammer or the language cause i have'nt paid much attention to it.
I wonder what review i will get for this one on bookyreviews.

enjoy madi

9:18 PM  
Blogger HP said...

@Ziom,

As usual, moi the first one to comment on this :-)

Excellent Post!! But, it leaves one hanging in the air. Probably, the story unfolds in the next post and please don't let this story stray like the numerous Hindi movie stroylines(yeah, Hindi movies do have stories).

The grammar was cool..No probs at all..

btw, Did I say, that you just hit a century on debut :-)

Chakk De Fatte Dost!!!

Definitely Enjoy Maddidine :-)

Cheers,
HP

9:39 PM  
Blogger HP said...

Btw, for the rest of the ppl concerned, Moiz thanks his manager ..

hmmnn...

Cheers,
HP

9:40 PM  
Blogger HP said...

Yeah, I know Mattu is gonna be cross with me for making multiple comments but then, old habits die hard :-)

"Can I specialize in saying 'Sick' in different ways?".

Moi thinks she can even specialize in saying quite a few other things and if all fails she can specialize in dieting.

Cheers,
HP

9:47 PM  
Blogger Snehal said...

@Ziom
Mattu is gonna kill u for this.
I think tht if u had come up with the entire story at one go then it definitely wud have broken the record for the most no of comments

@Hp
How many comments? Hameshsa raag dete rehta hai ki my seat is a public place I cannot do TP here n all tht shit.
Also ur deduction skills are as good as the legendary sherlock holmes.Moiz thanking his manager and all.A keen sense of observation u hav.

10:39 PM  
Blogger As If said...

ZIOM I could read only half of it, but whatever it is, you surely do rock.
A word of caution, keep away from mattu, coz when she sees this god only can save u.

11:03 PM  
Blogger Abhi said...

#Ziom,

Cool one :))
Trust me.. Mattu will kill u for this one !!!

awaiting the next Chapter eagerly .. be quick in publishing the series ..

njoy blogging,
Abhi.

11:15 PM  
Blogger HP said...

@Ppl,

I see no reason why Ziom should be afraid of Mattu!

Ziom had spoken the truth and the truth shall prevail :-)

Satyameva Jayate!!!!

Cheers,
HP

11:37 PM  
Blogger HP said...

@Snehal,

I do have a seat that is visible to all. Tujhe pata nahin kya kya papad belne padthe hain mujhe comments karne ke liye!!

Ppl just don't value hard work, now a days :-(

Cheers,
HP

11:39 PM  
Blogger Kurt said...

#Ziom

Dude excellent post dude.
But a word a caution BE AWARE OF MATTU , coz she hardly forgets.

Ask Me i took panga with her n she still has grudges against me.

Neways dont mind she'll take it in her stride.

3:42 AM  
Blogger mattu said...

@Ppl
Am back from the Smuggling IBM Rationally training.....
And i think my comments were much awaited.....
ok so here it goes...
@Ziom
I dint quite think u performed up to ur level coz i think u cud b funnier than this, n yes one more doubt
"I am going to become a doctor, but my dad want's me to become a software engineer and defy laws of W3C, just as he defies laws of gravity in his..."
In his??? plz xplain coz i dint quite get it.

And as for langoor n angoor one thing:
grapes r sour.....
So since u r neither angoor nor langoor or nowhere near a desi sharaab also, so plz keep ur sucku comments to urself.
But yes u cud've been funnier, it seems u hurried a little.

@HarryPotter
CTC
Y shud i specialize in dieting.Looking at u it seems u have specialized in it......

@Asif
Dude i dont wanna kill moiz....
uski toh shaadi bhi nahin hui...i hope na hi ho...poor Mrs Ziom....Creature ki successor.

@Kurt
Dude... now i know how yall conspired against me...yet again! :(
only this time snehal was also against me....
siggghhhhhhhh.....
but now i have been cautioned against yall, so this proves my previous post rite.

3:49 AM  
Blogger As If said...

Oye mattu moiz ki shadi bhi nahin hui hai se yaad aya.
Moiz bhai teri x-crush ko dekha tha Mocha mein details bataunga to teri aur jal jayegi, remeber Ms. Cha**a, sadly for you she doesn't look Ms any more and a Mrs instead.

3:54 AM  
Blogger Ziom said...

#Ppl
Where is your creativity?
I see the same line by everyone (except HP) "Mattu will kill Me".
I know she is on a hunt to Kill Bill(read Ziom), but i am not scared of her.
At lunch i have showed her what i am made up off.

#Abhi
Welcome to Ziomcity

4:12 AM  
Blogger mattu said...

@Ziom
the whole world knows n has seen ur expressions at lunch
a scared little rabbit wud laugh at u, that kali mirch paneer u ordered didnt go down ur throat alrite.....
n wht's the kill bill thingy about?
u havent yet paid ur bill to HP....u have killed bill....ziom u hvae killed bill
adios

4:17 AM  
Blogger Ziom said...

#Asif
Maang mein sindoor tha kya Chawla ke?
ne ways jus for your info, she is in Avita's project now and i m planning to join that proj. :)

#Mattu
"I am going to become a doctor, but my dad want's me to become a software engineer and defy laws of W3C, just as he defies laws of gravity in his..."

you did'nt get this?
Mattu's dad is Rajnikant, and he defies laws or gravity in his movies!!!

What had you thought gurl??? ;)

#Kurt/Snehal/HP/Asif
Please be with me in my dark times
I need your support (Not ur supporter)

4:28 AM  
Blogger HP said...

@Ziom,
Moi with you Dude :-)

Dont worry!!

Cheers,
HP

5:30 AM  
Blogger As If said...

ZIOM u in dark times??? whats that dark times all about. mattu se panga lekar itne bure din aagaye.

5:30 AM  
Anonymous troubled madrasi said...

How dare sumbuddy make funny of Rajnikantt the gr8. The madrasi association of india has decided to launch a crusade against ZIOM to remove all references to god a.k.a Rajnikant.
If our demends are not mat we would burn dawn bangaluru, chennai and hyderabad.

5:35 AM  
Blogger HP said...

@Ziom,
Moi with you Dude :-)

Dont worry!!

Cheers,
HPrry!!

Cheers,
HP

5:38 AM  
Blogger Ziom said...

#Ppl
I had implied that anonymous setting so that our not registered friends can comment too

#Mr. troubled Madrasi
go and cut your crap somewhere yelse, otherwise I will shoot you without a gun like Rajnikant.
If Rajni can't, I can.

6:22 AM  
Blogger HP said...

Pray! Why does the troubled Madrasi sound more like troubled Asif!!!

Cheers,
HP

6:24 AM  
Blogger As If said...

@HP,
Allegations and accusations haan!!!. I understand rajni is sacred for u and wont utter a word against him.

Anyways check out the update on the FUKAT blog.

mattu seems to have run out of steam along with Kurt, that explains their absence.

6:39 AM  
Blogger HP said...

@Asif,
Well,I was just wondering aloud :-)

Don't worry about Kurt. He has an ace up his sleeve and so does Mattu. Watch out for them.

btw, Abhi said that he was gonna write something. Waiting for it!

Don't expect anything from Snehal :-)

Cheers,
HP

7:19 AM  
Blogger mattu said...

@Ziom
i thought defying laws of gravity....
newez u wudn't understand
And as for supporter u mite get their supporter if not support.(pre-condition: If they wud wanna share it)-[Yeah Rational Developer's training]
N yeah i found out numerable grammatical mistakes that surprisingly Hairy Harry cudn't see........

@Angry Madrasi
CTC and plz HP n Kurt r the only southies here so do not take pangas.

@Kurt
BE AWARE OF MATTU
or beware of mattu?
newez am just the one who critises pple rite? so lemme ctc.

@HairyPotter
CTC
Dude, u r siding with moiz? dude he's the one who's gonna get beaten up.So plz decide.

@Sneh
Dude
Get up man plz talk.

@Asif
Good wait till i unleash the truth about y ziom wrote this post........

10:02 AM  
Blogger As If said...

I expect Abhi to be the last person to dish out crap, but u never know the hidden talents.

9:52 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello

8:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

9:05 PM  
Blogger HP said...

Who is this anonymous who is practising his communication skills over here?

Cheers,
HP

7:22 AM  
Blogger As If said...

Was wondering the same.

12:00 AM  
Blogger As If said...

ZIOM chapter 2!!!

12:00 AM  
Blogger Ziom said...

sorry guys got busy with sum fukat work, CH-2 has to wait 2weeks

9:08 AM  
Blogger Ziom said...

#anonymous
Mr. anonymous please atleast write something, or did you tried just to give us a missed comment

9:10 AM  
Blogger HP said...

2weeks is a big time Dost!!
try to make something up quickly!!

Cheers,
HP

11:55 PM  
Anonymous Iyer Education said...

#Ziom
Congratulations for your first post buddy.

8:00 AM  
Blogger As If said...

ZIOM, yeh template aur title sab change kaise ho gaya bhai. Mocha meet ka itna asar!!!

11:18 PM  
Blogger Ziom said...

Just tried to make it look like a city :)

6:51 AM  
Blogger Pri said...

Hey Moiz! Wats up? Sorry fr not commentin prompty...So howz work & life in general? Chal tc! Njoy!

Cheers,
Pri..

4:07 AM  
Blogger HP said...

New New New Post post Post

11:21 PM  
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